Being alone in life does have some benefits. No one would annoy you and avoid you from getting your work done and done well. No one would be needing your attention at many time periods of the day. No one will nag at you. No one will seemingly be a liability for you. No one will spend your own hard-earned money. No one will call you every night, removing your chance of a good night’s sleep. No one will be your rival in case there would be a third party in your relationship.
Of course, being alone in life does have some regrets. No one will be loved by you. No one will love you. No one will cheer for you and be your inspiration at work. No one will attend to you at many time periods of the day. No one will nag at you, and yet you would have liked being nagged. No one will be a liability for you, and yet you would have wanted someone to share all your blessings in life. No one will spend your own hard-earned money, and make you feel needed and depended on. No one will call you every night, lifting you up from all the stress during the day. No one will have confided your entire life on, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do you part, and all that yadda-yadda.
Being alone in life is fun, in a way that you can fool around without anyone caring. But if you are not that kind of person, being alone in life gets kinda sad. On the other hand, tying the knot to a person does have some regrets, especially when you are the type of person who fools around.
What am I trying to say here? Am I defending my cause of being single? I always used to think: the horror of being single is but one day of an entire year. Valentines Day, nothing else. During that season, I see many couplesâ€¦ as if the expression of love comes only once every year.
As I have fallen in and out of love years ago, would I want to return to that kind of life again? If it was a dream, indeed now I have woken up from that dream, and moved on. So, would I want to return to the dream? Hardlyâ€¦ I found out that I have no one to love. As if I had been cursed not to fall in love again. Why? Was I so wrong in the dream? That I do not deserve another dream? Or even a reality just for once?
This topic will only yearn to ask more questions than answers. Is it true that life is less fruitful without someone to nag? Without someone to lay down your finances and insurance plans for? Without someone to carry on your family name? Is it really a shame to have no one to share your blessings to, or your business perhaps? Is life really a waste of time just because no one happens to be your soulmate in this world? How does love bloom? Do people still believe in love at first sight? Is there such a thing as ‘looking for love’ just like what I’m trying to convey a while back? Why is this thing called love so complicated, that it renders both pain and pleasure? Why are there more variations in love than stars in the sky? Why do billions of lives even feel it?
I will end the questions here.
This must be my most disoriented post so far, for a simple reasonâ€¦ I’m so frustrated. Somehow I realized that I have not found someone to love again. I typed that phrase as if I’m ‘shopping for love’, but I didn’t mean it that way. For the simple reason of inspiration. As of now, I’m on the verge of making my own money-laundering activitiesâ€¦ without a special ‘someone’ to give it to. Of course giving it to family is a given, but thinking about it deeper, I don’t really need too much money. Sure I would want some gadgets, buy stuff or whatnot, but in the end, all these luxuries are worth nothing in the end. Sure, I’ll count all price tags, but giving the gifts from God to someone specialâ€¦ priceless. The things money can’t buyâ€¦ happiness and love. If there is no love, there is no happiness. Sure there are some other kinds of love in my system, but not having that special loveâ€¦ I would feel incomplete happiness.
Now I would tend to believe that the horror of being single is not just for one day each year. The horror of being single will last a lifetime on a person who is longing for a love that doesn’t exist. Sure, there are other ways of living life without love. I just happen to be very unlucky, because I now feel like I need love to survive in life. Really unlucky.